"GOODBYE"

I took a deep breath.
Nothing in this world stays the same and they don't remain.
Things, people, memories slowly fade away...
The decision I've made, changes things right at the moment.
Left only, the flashbacks of everything.
It's not going to be the same, but i will walk it through, by FAITH.
I loosen the grip and was relieved.
It's more than a word "goodbye".
I left here, before the time ended.
It's like i am writing my story now and end with a twist.
It will not be a cliff hanger because i will hold on tight on what i have and what i want to achieve. =)

finally..

She said she wanted to see me. I puzzled with fear at first, but at last i decided to walk in and meet her. I prayed " God, grant me the wisdom to speak." I entered, she looked at me with a furious ans serious eyes and asked "婧柔，你可以听我说话吗？ ” I nodded. She gave me a lot of advices and guidances which i have already expected. I wasn't shaken, but my mind was stucked. I thought i was being a rebellious student. It wasn't like that. She ended her words and asked me to think deeper. The world freezed. Finally i decided to say out. "校长，我决定了。”
When i walked out, i was still trembling. Not in fear nor simply excited. I know once i have spoken that, i am responsible for my words and my life. I am gonna pray that God, no matter what happens, You'll open doors for me.
-with all sincerity and truth, i cling on YOUR PROMISES.

sweet =)

-The love under a hawthorn tree-
"You promise me that when you hear my name, you'll come back "
"I cannot wait for a year and a month, i cannot wait till you're 25, but i will wait for forever."

-The Last Song-
"I just need to know are you still there"
"When i say i am in and i am not going anywhere, can you believe that?"
"You are dead but it's alive for me now"

love you dad =)

there's no greater joy i found today then meeting you daddy =)
how i have longed for moments like this =) just chatting with you, laughing with you, patting your back and push you while you walk, saying nonsence and joke with you =) feeling the whole world is only me and you..
DADDY AND DAUGHTER
dad, you said i love to touch things since i was young, you once brought me to Sains Negara. I touched everything i see and i saw a light bulb and thought it was a button. I touched it and ouch, my finger burned =)
You know since mum left, you're the only person to remind me the funny things during childhood.
I love you =)
You used to just suddenly stop when i walk behind of you and i collided with you.
You used to pull my nose and said let it grow taller =) how foolish.
You used to break your promises but now i know i can count on something finally.
Rather than saying you left us before, now i would say that daddy, i am glad you came back.
I said today, " dad, i will be officially 17 soon..means you have grown older for 17 years after having me" =)
you always thought i am still a baby girl..so small so small..
You said you're 42 this year, i counted... when i am 30, almost the age of getting married, you're 55.. i did not tell you what i was thinking .. that's a secret of letting you know that i want you to hold me into the church =)
but i said " dad, be careful of your diet, your tummy is coming out, i want you to be healthy and have a long-life"
 I MEAN IT =)
thank you daddy..

born again =)

i'm a little bit excited because my birthday is coming soon =)
it's time to clear off some old messages so i have enough memory to let people spam my phone with wishes =)
this year's birthday i am gonna make myself someone who is new born to earth and don't own anything.
Why??
Because i wanna feel once again of being grateful about everything i have and everything that i don't deserve =)
if i held on to too many wishes, i am sure at the end of the day, there will be some little disappointments and i don't think i want it =)
things may come when you least expect them too.
so..dady mamy i love you =)
i will be officially seventeen SOON =) !!

merely a performance

i saw you posting that..for the first second i was extremely excited because what you just said i said before..
but after a second i thought, why was i reacting like that..
i knew somehow i was happy to know that..we still share something together =P
there's always something..very true huh.
Celine dion >> a new day, that's the way it is, TO LOVE YOU MORE

all the while

all the while i have been saying "nice" words to give myself a little comfort. A lot of times i remind myself not to do things to serve men but to serve God, and i always say "it's okay, i have tried". But my heart always yearn for results, yearn for some fruits that i can see and feel . I sang " my heart and faith will not be shaken"..

it comes to thursday once again.
it's always about thursday.
now i will tell myself, i am leaving soon. to start well and finish well is my goal and that's all.
what i can do. i have done.
I'll leave out the rest to God =)

i will go back to the beginning once again to build myself =)

 i love you all and hope you love me too.